Instructions: For each scenario, list a reasonable explanation.
1. Your students are noisier than usual.
It's the Friday before spring break.
2. Your students can't sit still.
They just came back from a long, boring assembly.
3. Over 90% of your students did NOT do their homework last night.
My teaching partner scares them more than I do, so they all studied for the science test instead of writing their social studies papers.
4. One of your students threatens a teacher on his FaceBook page.
FaceBook was spawned by Satan to entrap people with no attention span and turn them into sociopaths with no conscience.
5. For the first time in 4 years, a bird poops all over the passenger side window of your car.
My emotionally disturbed rescue dog has mellowed so much that he no longer barks enough to scare away the birds.
6. The teachers at another school in the district abandon the rules of courtesy and begin harassing the daughter of a school board member about how stupid your school board is.
Maybe the girl was the mastermind behind some evil plot to control the minds of seven district leaders. Or maybe those teachers just suck.
7. A fax machine from the elementary school's office calls your classroom 11 times in 30 minutes (during class, of course).
Perhaps the machine has a philosophical objection to students learning about the multitude of nifty things that the ancient Chinese invented. (Or the fax machine was made in China and is bitter about being shipped off to the U.S.?)
8. One of your students decides to spin in circles on the way to the pencil sharpener and subsequently barfs in your classroom sink.
I'm running out of reasonable explanations here... Maybe he's just an immature 12-year-old.
9. All of your water bottles are in the dishwasher, you run out of bottled water at school, and the school water is temporarily unsanitary due to a nearby hydrant flush.
The department of public works thought it would be fun to see just how whiny a room full of 7th graders can get right after PE?
10. ALL OF THE ABOVE, on the same day.
(No, seriously. All of it. Yesterday.)
Disregard my previous answers, please. It was obviously a full moon.
Friday, May 28, 2010
Friday, May 21, 2010
Pet Names
Mr. Chandler has told me a couple times about a student who named his chicken Teriyaki. (I believe this student lives on a farm, but maybe he just had really progressive parents when it comes to pets.) Today, while trying to read my cousin's latest blog posting, I stumbled across a blog called "The Occasional Chicken." I figured it was about the writer's sporadic bouts with cowardice, but it wasn't. It's about the writer's three chickens. He's been raising these chickens for almost a year now, and he takes pictures of them and writes about their activities, etc. The chickens' names are Pot Pie, Salad Sandwich, and Noodle Soup.
This brought all kinds of thoughts into my head -- (thoughts about pet names, mostly, although there may have been a random thought about getting my car washed as well). I like it when people are creative with the names they give to people and things. (My friend and I name our cars, but that's kind of personal, so I won't be sharing that with you.) My high school choir director had a pair of house cats, one black and one white, whose names were Song and Dance. On a TV show we were watching recently, Mr. Chandler and I were amused by the name of a pet frog: Fliza Minelli (flies + liza). My brother had a cat with no name for years. We all called her "the baby" or just Kitty, and the vet put Kitty on all of her records and meds.
My own dog -- Small Dog -- is saddled with a complete misnomer of his own. His name is Sonny, but he isn't. Sadly for him, I've long suspected that his name was given long before his grouchy nature developed. We're trying to help him; his life is certainly better (and more luxurious) since he came to live with us.
We had a difficult time settling on a name for our other dog, Big Dog. His real name is Jake, but we discussed Charlie for a while before making a decision. I've often wondered if his personality would have been different if he was a Charlie. A teacher friend once told me that boys with J names are usually the biggest behavior problems in a classroom, and my nine years of teaching support that theory. I don't start the school year thinking that, but it usually pops into my brain at some point between February and April. Anyway, that always makes me wonder if part of Big Dog's hyperactivity is because of his name...
We like to call our dogs other things, as well: Schmuppies (this always makes me think of Muppets), Pupplies (I have no idea why!), All Dogs (from the movie All Dogs Go to Heaven), Jake-opotamus, Jake-osaurus, Sonny Bunny Funny Honey, Old Man (only the grouchy small dog), Wild Outdoor Jake (who doesn't seem that different from Indoor Jake), etc. I intended for this post to be about the actual names people give to their pets, but I seem to have veered into "pet names" or nicknames instead. I've come full circle, I guess. I think I'm going to start calling my dogs "Blog Dog." This is meant to sound a lot like "slug bug," now that I think about it, and I may have just invented a new game for my neighborhood. If you see my dog running down the street (not at all out of the realm of possibility for Big Dog!), you can now play a variation of "slug bug" called "Blog Dog."
This brought all kinds of thoughts into my head -- (thoughts about pet names, mostly, although there may have been a random thought about getting my car washed as well). I like it when people are creative with the names they give to people and things. (My friend and I name our cars, but that's kind of personal, so I won't be sharing that with you.) My high school choir director had a pair of house cats, one black and one white, whose names were Song and Dance. On a TV show we were watching recently, Mr. Chandler and I were amused by the name of a pet frog: Fliza Minelli (flies + liza). My brother had a cat with no name for years. We all called her "the baby" or just Kitty, and the vet put Kitty on all of her records and meds.
My own dog -- Small Dog -- is saddled with a complete misnomer of his own. His name is Sonny, but he isn't. Sadly for him, I've long suspected that his name was given long before his grouchy nature developed. We're trying to help him; his life is certainly better (and more luxurious) since he came to live with us.
We had a difficult time settling on a name for our other dog, Big Dog. His real name is Jake, but we discussed Charlie for a while before making a decision. I've often wondered if his personality would have been different if he was a Charlie. A teacher friend once told me that boys with J names are usually the biggest behavior problems in a classroom, and my nine years of teaching support that theory. I don't start the school year thinking that, but it usually pops into my brain at some point between February and April. Anyway, that always makes me wonder if part of Big Dog's hyperactivity is because of his name...
We like to call our dogs other things, as well: Schmuppies (this always makes me think of Muppets), Pupplies (I have no idea why!), All Dogs (from the movie All Dogs Go to Heaven), Jake-opotamus, Jake-osaurus, Sonny Bunny Funny Honey, Old Man (only the grouchy small dog), Wild Outdoor Jake (who doesn't seem that different from Indoor Jake), etc. I intended for this post to be about the actual names people give to their pets, but I seem to have veered into "pet names" or nicknames instead. I've come full circle, I guess. I think I'm going to start calling my dogs "Blog Dog." This is meant to sound a lot like "slug bug," now that I think about it, and I may have just invented a new game for my neighborhood. If you see my dog running down the street (not at all out of the realm of possibility for Big Dog!), you can now play a variation of "slug bug" called "Blog Dog."
Monday, May 17, 2010
Second Week of May
Monday
After a long weekend of outdoor work, I find myself lacking the motivation to do anything remotely responsible this evening. We spent Saturday travelling around to get the various ingredients necessary for a cute flowerbed and added a couple of rain barrels in the process, something I’ve been wanting for a long time. Then we spent the rest of the weekend planting and cleaning off the patio. And now I just want to sit out here and enjoy the flowers and the fountain and the bumblebees fluttering around the lavender. Dishes? Laundry? Housework? What housework? I have outdoor chores – like watching Little Dog trot around the perimeter of the yard (stopping each time to pee on the same little flower, which, I’m fairly sure, will not survive). I’m taking a lesson from Big Dog, who is currently sitting among the rosemary bushes, sniffing the wind and basking in the sunshine.
Tuesday
I kept two of my worst kids after school for detention today. One of them spent most of detention saying things like, “What would happen to me if I walk out during detention?” and “I hate this school. I hope it burns down.” In a random moment of wisdom, I managed to ignore him during all of these obnoxious little comments. I figured that he was looking for a reaction, and I was not going to give him one. (This is like a Life Lesson or Major Rule or something: If you can’t be appropriate when you speak to me, then I don’t have to continue the conversation!) It worked well, and when he suddenly turned to his social studies book and asked me what page he needed to start on, I promptly provided him with a calm answer. He stared at me for a second, and then turned back to his homework. The other boy, who has virtually no mental filter and an endless supply of tricks for avoiding the task at hand, turned to me and asked, “Are you ignoring him until he asks a homework-related question?” Both boys waited for my answer, so I smiled and said, “How many things have you labeled on your map?”
These boys are enough to make a person wish for a career change. This one particular student has been driving me nuts all year. He spent half of the year tormenting my math/science partner until they pulled him out of her class. I sometimes feel like my calm classroom presence works against me – it provides the “powers that be” with an excuse to leave him in my class. “Let’s not mess with his schedule. Mrs. Chandler can handle him.” So because I handle my discipline problems in the classroom (and don’t have many in the first place), I get stuck with the psychos.
During the endless detention experience today, I had to keep reminding myself that I’m not doing this because I expect one detention to change their personalities. I’m doing this because inappropriate behavior requires consequences. And I’m doing this to create the appropriate paper trail so that when I write the referrals that are coming, the administrators will take the situation more seriously because of the consequences I’ve already tried with these students. It’s just a paper trail. That’s all it is. If they happen to get some of their missing work taken care of in the process, that's an unexpected benefit. I can't call it a bonus or the cherry on top or anything like that... those phrases imply that I'm having a good time or that I'm getting something positive from these detentions. I'm not. They suck more for me than they do for the students.
Wednesday
This is crazy. We had a review session today for a big quiz they’re taking on Friday. I let the students work in teams for the review session, so they were gathered in groups around the room. I have three classes of students for an hour and a half each during my teaching day. During my first class, there was a crazy moment when one of my students got so excited about knowing the answer to a question that he bounced up and down in his seat. As he came back down toward the seat of his chair, he missed the chair and slid off onto the floor, his feet and legs flying up into the air. (He was okay; he thought it was kind of funny.)
I am not writing about this to make fun of my student; this is only part one of today’s story. During my second class, as we went through the same review in groups, there was a rather intense moment when one of my students got frustrated because his team got an answer wrong. He slammed his fist down on the desk, but the force sort of pushed him backwards. Because he was sitting sideways in his chair, he slid backward off the seat and onto the floor, his feet and legs flying up into the air. (He was okay; he thought it was kind of funny.)
No, it wasn’t the same chair or area of the room. But still, it’s a weird coincidence. Twice in one day? So weird!
Now, I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking, “OMG, it happened in third period too!” But it didn’t. Instead, one of my students (walking from the Kleenex box back to his chair) accidentally interrupted the review session by getting his foot caught in the cord that raises and lowers the mini-blinds on my classroom windows. He didn’t know what had happened at first, so he turned around – in the wrong direction – and inadvertently released the mechanism that holds the blinds in place. The blinds began to lower on their own, which caused the cord to wind up into the top, which caused the boy’s foot and leg to be pulled higher and higher into the air, which caused him to lose his balance and put his arms out and hop forward a little, which allowed the cord to pull his foot even higher… until he looked like a very uncomfortable ballerina.
He was okay; I thought it was crazy, hilarious… and a really creepy coincidence.
Thursday
Today, one of our district behavior specialists came to observe the same boy who was hoping the school would burn down during detention on Tuesday. The boy in question managed to sit quietly, answer questions appropriately, and finish his assignment completely. The poor behavior specialist looked aggravated and will probably have to repeat the observation some other day; his observation was supposed to be about the behaviors that lead to this student getting kicked out and sent to another classroom. How crazy... I wonder if the specialist now thinks this kid is fine. I wonder even more what made the difference in the kid's behavior.
I think maybe crazy is the theme for this week. At the school board meeting tonight, one of the teachers presented to the board by performing a very creative rap while he beat-boxed his own rap rhythm. After his performance (and the crowd went wild), the school board chairwoman scolded him for it, saying the community didn’t appreciate rap and would probably be offended by that. She’s obviously not familiar with the west end of the school district, which, for you Portland natives, includes the fashionable and luxurious Rockwood area. I don’t even know what else to say about this; it’s just too crazy.
Friday
And the crazy continues…
I had to get a sub today because I was called into all-day contract negotiations. It was an insane day to have a sub. During homeroom, we were supposed to take our classes out to line the main hall of the school so that we could cheer on our Lifeskills class as they departed for the regional Special Olympics. During 3rd period, seven of my students were supposed to escort 5th graders around on their tour of the school. During 5th period, we were supposed to have an earthquake drill. We’re still collecting progress reports, each class is supposed to go to the library mid-way through class, and my kids are taking a massive quiz today. My teaching partner (who is also my buddy classroom) is gone today as well, and there are eight other subs in the building. How could this possibly be a worse day for a substitute? (Don't answer that; it's a rhetorical question.)
*After a long and arduous day of negotiations and caucuses and proposals and counter proposals, I decided to go home. So I don’t actually know how it went with the sub. I’m now sitting out in my backyard garden, watching my dogs browse among the rosemary, and I just can’t bring myself to care that much. I’ll worry about this on Monday.
After a long weekend of outdoor work, I find myself lacking the motivation to do anything remotely responsible this evening. We spent Saturday travelling around to get the various ingredients necessary for a cute flowerbed and added a couple of rain barrels in the process, something I’ve been wanting for a long time. Then we spent the rest of the weekend planting and cleaning off the patio. And now I just want to sit out here and enjoy the flowers and the fountain and the bumblebees fluttering around the lavender. Dishes? Laundry? Housework? What housework? I have outdoor chores – like watching Little Dog trot around the perimeter of the yard (stopping each time to pee on the same little flower, which, I’m fairly sure, will not survive). I’m taking a lesson from Big Dog, who is currently sitting among the rosemary bushes, sniffing the wind and basking in the sunshine.
Tuesday
I kept two of my worst kids after school for detention today. One of them spent most of detention saying things like, “What would happen to me if I walk out during detention?” and “I hate this school. I hope it burns down.” In a random moment of wisdom, I managed to ignore him during all of these obnoxious little comments. I figured that he was looking for a reaction, and I was not going to give him one. (This is like a Life Lesson or Major Rule or something: If you can’t be appropriate when you speak to me, then I don’t have to continue the conversation!) It worked well, and when he suddenly turned to his social studies book and asked me what page he needed to start on, I promptly provided him with a calm answer. He stared at me for a second, and then turned back to his homework. The other boy, who has virtually no mental filter and an endless supply of tricks for avoiding the task at hand, turned to me and asked, “Are you ignoring him until he asks a homework-related question?” Both boys waited for my answer, so I smiled and said, “How many things have you labeled on your map?”
These boys are enough to make a person wish for a career change. This one particular student has been driving me nuts all year. He spent half of the year tormenting my math/science partner until they pulled him out of her class. I sometimes feel like my calm classroom presence works against me – it provides the “powers that be” with an excuse to leave him in my class. “Let’s not mess with his schedule. Mrs. Chandler can handle him.” So because I handle my discipline problems in the classroom (and don’t have many in the first place), I get stuck with the psychos.
During the endless detention experience today, I had to keep reminding myself that I’m not doing this because I expect one detention to change their personalities. I’m doing this because inappropriate behavior requires consequences. And I’m doing this to create the appropriate paper trail so that when I write the referrals that are coming, the administrators will take the situation more seriously because of the consequences I’ve already tried with these students. It’s just a paper trail. That’s all it is. If they happen to get some of their missing work taken care of in the process, that's an unexpected benefit. I can't call it a bonus or the cherry on top or anything like that... those phrases imply that I'm having a good time or that I'm getting something positive from these detentions. I'm not. They suck more for me than they do for the students.
Wednesday
This is crazy. We had a review session today for a big quiz they’re taking on Friday. I let the students work in teams for the review session, so they were gathered in groups around the room. I have three classes of students for an hour and a half each during my teaching day. During my first class, there was a crazy moment when one of my students got so excited about knowing the answer to a question that he bounced up and down in his seat. As he came back down toward the seat of his chair, he missed the chair and slid off onto the floor, his feet and legs flying up into the air. (He was okay; he thought it was kind of funny.)
I am not writing about this to make fun of my student; this is only part one of today’s story. During my second class, as we went through the same review in groups, there was a rather intense moment when one of my students got frustrated because his team got an answer wrong. He slammed his fist down on the desk, but the force sort of pushed him backwards. Because he was sitting sideways in his chair, he slid backward off the seat and onto the floor, his feet and legs flying up into the air. (He was okay; he thought it was kind of funny.)
No, it wasn’t the same chair or area of the room. But still, it’s a weird coincidence. Twice in one day? So weird!
Now, I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking, “OMG, it happened in third period too!” But it didn’t. Instead, one of my students (walking from the Kleenex box back to his chair) accidentally interrupted the review session by getting his foot caught in the cord that raises and lowers the mini-blinds on my classroom windows. He didn’t know what had happened at first, so he turned around – in the wrong direction – and inadvertently released the mechanism that holds the blinds in place. The blinds began to lower on their own, which caused the cord to wind up into the top, which caused the boy’s foot and leg to be pulled higher and higher into the air, which caused him to lose his balance and put his arms out and hop forward a little, which allowed the cord to pull his foot even higher… until he looked like a very uncomfortable ballerina.
He was okay; I thought it was crazy, hilarious… and a really creepy coincidence.
Thursday
Today, one of our district behavior specialists came to observe the same boy who was hoping the school would burn down during detention on Tuesday. The boy in question managed to sit quietly, answer questions appropriately, and finish his assignment completely. The poor behavior specialist looked aggravated and will probably have to repeat the observation some other day; his observation was supposed to be about the behaviors that lead to this student getting kicked out and sent to another classroom. How crazy... I wonder if the specialist now thinks this kid is fine. I wonder even more what made the difference in the kid's behavior.
I think maybe crazy is the theme for this week. At the school board meeting tonight, one of the teachers presented to the board by performing a very creative rap while he beat-boxed his own rap rhythm. After his performance (and the crowd went wild), the school board chairwoman scolded him for it, saying the community didn’t appreciate rap and would probably be offended by that. She’s obviously not familiar with the west end of the school district, which, for you Portland natives, includes the fashionable and luxurious Rockwood area. I don’t even know what else to say about this; it’s just too crazy.
Friday
And the crazy continues…
I had to get a sub today because I was called into all-day contract negotiations. It was an insane day to have a sub. During homeroom, we were supposed to take our classes out to line the main hall of the school so that we could cheer on our Lifeskills class as they departed for the regional Special Olympics. During 3rd period, seven of my students were supposed to escort 5th graders around on their tour of the school. During 5th period, we were supposed to have an earthquake drill. We’re still collecting progress reports, each class is supposed to go to the library mid-way through class, and my kids are taking a massive quiz today. My teaching partner (who is also my buddy classroom) is gone today as well, and there are eight other subs in the building. How could this possibly be a worse day for a substitute? (Don't answer that; it's a rhetorical question.)
*After a long and arduous day of negotiations and caucuses and proposals and counter proposals, I decided to go home. So I don’t actually know how it went with the sub. I’m now sitting out in my backyard garden, watching my dogs browse among the rosemary, and I just can’t bring myself to care that much. I’ll worry about this on Monday.
Sunday, May 16, 2010
First Week of May
Monday
Every other Monday, I drive to midtown for a counseling appointment. I usually take the freeway and get off at the exit closest to Providence Hospital. For the last year, they’ve been building a new Providence building at the intersection of Halsey and the 43rd St. exit ramp. For a while, Mr. Chandler and I were taking bets about what it was going to be, but eventually we both agreed that it had to be a Providence building. It’s the usual Providence mix of brick and glass, and it’s close enough to the main hospital campus to allow employees to travel between them quickly and easily. The building is almost finished now, and they have been putting in landscaping. At the northeast corner of the building, there are some picnic tables sheltered by giant bronze umbrella sculptures. I love them. One is upside down and looks like it would be fun for kids to play on/around. Some are actually functioning as umbrellas over the tables, although they’re oversized sculptures, so if you actually sat under one, you’d feel very small. The whole courtyard has a sort of Munchkin-Land-mixed-with-Portland effect that I think is very whimsical and creative. I might have to go have a picnic there sometime.
Tuesday
Instead of a staff meeting this morning, we met in the computer lab and had to take a technology test. I have no idea why the teachers have to take this test; apparently the government wants to know how tech-savvy we are. I don’t know what the highest staff score was, but I did a respectable job on the test. That is, I did better than the highest student score, and that’s really all I cared about. I used to teach a technology class, so a lot of it was easy (how do you write a formula in a spreadsheet, etc.). The real issue is not how much the teachers know about technology. The real issue is actually getting technology for teachers (and students) to use!
Wednesday
We had a funny discussion in one of my classes today about rules. My kids are reading a book about bands of children in 1925 post-Bolshevik Revolution Moscow, and the band that the main character joins has developed its own set of rules. Some of my students, predictably, thought this was weird and claimed they would never have rules if they were in a gang of wild kids like that. Others recognized immediately the value of the rules, which included things like no killing, no stealing from each other, no infectious diseases, and no alcohol. A good friend of mine who has now retired from teaching used to use a quote with her students to frame this discussion, and I pulled it out and dusted it off for this particular chapter in the novel. The quote (and I have no idea who said/wrote it) goes like this:
“True freedom requires managing the boundaries.”
There are all kinds of personal applications of this that have been true in my own life, but in this case, it worked well as a hint to the students about the characters’ rules in the book we’re reading. The kids talked about the school rules that make them feel safe and the school rules that make them feel restricted, and then they were able to apply this to the novel and come up with reasons for each of the rules put in place in this band of wild children. It was a great discussion, and I saw several “ah ha” moments take place. (Oh yeah... that's why I love this job...)
Thursday
Yikes. I had a half-day sub today because I was going with a member to an investigatory meeting at one of the elementary schools. (The sub was not the “yikes.” The investigatory meeting was the “yikes.”) This principal is one angry man. Fortunately, the teacher did a great job. She was calm, clear, and honest, and she answered all of his questions and provided more info than he was expecting.
I had to spend some time convincing the principal that he couldn’t just jump in without telling her what he was investigating… “Tell me about this student.” “What do you want to know about him? Where do I start?” “Oh, just tell me about him.” Um… no. The member has the right to know the nature of the investigation. He was really grumpy about this, but he finally got it right.
I know it’s necessary, but this part – representing members in unpleasant meetings with angry administrators – is definitely not my favorite part of this job.
Tonight we went to Home Depot to look for a door that comes with a pet door already installed in it. (It seems easier than cutting a hole in a metal door.) I was discouraged to find out that they don’t actually sell any pet-door doors at Home Depot. Actually, the man in the door section said they don’t sell those anywhere; instead you’re supposed to take your door and the pet door to someone who will do the cutting and installing for you. That seems kind of ridiculous. Why can’t they sell the doors pre-made? Isn’t there a construction industry standard for doors? Argh… I’m not going to pay someone to cut a hole in my door, especially not if I have to take the door off its hinges and transport it to the cutter/installer person. (How is one expected to transport a door, exactly? My car holds a lot, but that’s pushing it.) The Home Depot door man also said that current codes require a solid barrier between the garage and the house, so we're not actually allowed to put a pet door where we want to. We'll have to figure something else out.
Friday
What a glorious day!
Today is the first sunny day of this week, and after such a long stretch of rain, I think my need to get outside was as strong as that of my dogs. When I finally got home, we spend over an hour in the backyard – me trimming flowers and watering plants and generally puttering in the garden, and the dogs sniffing and peeing and barking and running and other happy-dog pastimes.
In addition to the lovely weather and the inviting outdoors, I managed a delightful hat trick with friends today. (Hat Trick = 3 in a row, usually refers to goals in sports)
My Friends Hat Trick --
1. My best friend Soldier Girl met me at school for lunch today. We had a very cheerful time. I’ve missed being able to talk to her in person, and I’ve missed getting to see her while she talks to me. (She’s very expressive.)
2. After school, I met my retired teacher friend Gretchen for coffee (although neither of us actually drank coffee). We had a lovely time. We talked about our families, our anxieties, what books we’ve been reading, what we’ve been learning, what churches we want to visit, and anything else we could think of. Gretchen is a kindred spirit; she understands me in a way that most people don’t. And I understand her fears and what is precious to her more than most people do. It was so refreshing to talk with her -- food for the soul.
3. After a disastrously stressful day, my teacher friend Connie called and wanted to hang out in the evening. She came and vented about her wretched day, and then we laughed together at my crazy dogs, and finally we decided to go see a late movie. Mr. Chandler went with us, and we chose “How to Train Your Dragon.” I’ve actually had an advertising poster for this movie stapled to my classroom wall since December, but I hadn’t seen the movie yet. It was quite entertaining. I really liked the way they animated and characterized the black dragon; he reminded me of a playful cat. The Viking boy was funny, and the animation was extremely creative in several places. I enjoyed it so much, I might have to see it again!
Every other Monday, I drive to midtown for a counseling appointment. I usually take the freeway and get off at the exit closest to Providence Hospital. For the last year, they’ve been building a new Providence building at the intersection of Halsey and the 43rd St. exit ramp. For a while, Mr. Chandler and I were taking bets about what it was going to be, but eventually we both agreed that it had to be a Providence building. It’s the usual Providence mix of brick and glass, and it’s close enough to the main hospital campus to allow employees to travel between them quickly and easily. The building is almost finished now, and they have been putting in landscaping. At the northeast corner of the building, there are some picnic tables sheltered by giant bronze umbrella sculptures. I love them. One is upside down and looks like it would be fun for kids to play on/around. Some are actually functioning as umbrellas over the tables, although they’re oversized sculptures, so if you actually sat under one, you’d feel very small. The whole courtyard has a sort of Munchkin-Land-mixed-with-Portland effect that I think is very whimsical and creative. I might have to go have a picnic there sometime.
Tuesday
Instead of a staff meeting this morning, we met in the computer lab and had to take a technology test. I have no idea why the teachers have to take this test; apparently the government wants to know how tech-savvy we are. I don’t know what the highest staff score was, but I did a respectable job on the test. That is, I did better than the highest student score, and that’s really all I cared about. I used to teach a technology class, so a lot of it was easy (how do you write a formula in a spreadsheet, etc.). The real issue is not how much the teachers know about technology. The real issue is actually getting technology for teachers (and students) to use!
Wednesday
We had a funny discussion in one of my classes today about rules. My kids are reading a book about bands of children in 1925 post-Bolshevik Revolution Moscow, and the band that the main character joins has developed its own set of rules. Some of my students, predictably, thought this was weird and claimed they would never have rules if they were in a gang of wild kids like that. Others recognized immediately the value of the rules, which included things like no killing, no stealing from each other, no infectious diseases, and no alcohol. A good friend of mine who has now retired from teaching used to use a quote with her students to frame this discussion, and I pulled it out and dusted it off for this particular chapter in the novel. The quote (and I have no idea who said/wrote it) goes like this:
“True freedom requires managing the boundaries.”
There are all kinds of personal applications of this that have been true in my own life, but in this case, it worked well as a hint to the students about the characters’ rules in the book we’re reading. The kids talked about the school rules that make them feel safe and the school rules that make them feel restricted, and then they were able to apply this to the novel and come up with reasons for each of the rules put in place in this band of wild children. It was a great discussion, and I saw several “ah ha” moments take place. (Oh yeah... that's why I love this job...)
Thursday
Yikes. I had a half-day sub today because I was going with a member to an investigatory meeting at one of the elementary schools. (The sub was not the “yikes.” The investigatory meeting was the “yikes.”) This principal is one angry man. Fortunately, the teacher did a great job. She was calm, clear, and honest, and she answered all of his questions and provided more info than he was expecting.
I had to spend some time convincing the principal that he couldn’t just jump in without telling her what he was investigating… “Tell me about this student.” “What do you want to know about him? Where do I start?” “Oh, just tell me about him.” Um… no. The member has the right to know the nature of the investigation. He was really grumpy about this, but he finally got it right.
I know it’s necessary, but this part – representing members in unpleasant meetings with angry administrators – is definitely not my favorite part of this job.
Tonight we went to Home Depot to look for a door that comes with a pet door already installed in it. (It seems easier than cutting a hole in a metal door.) I was discouraged to find out that they don’t actually sell any pet-door doors at Home Depot. Actually, the man in the door section said they don’t sell those anywhere; instead you’re supposed to take your door and the pet door to someone who will do the cutting and installing for you. That seems kind of ridiculous. Why can’t they sell the doors pre-made? Isn’t there a construction industry standard for doors? Argh… I’m not going to pay someone to cut a hole in my door, especially not if I have to take the door off its hinges and transport it to the cutter/installer person. (How is one expected to transport a door, exactly? My car holds a lot, but that’s pushing it.) The Home Depot door man also said that current codes require a solid barrier between the garage and the house, so we're not actually allowed to put a pet door where we want to. We'll have to figure something else out.
Friday
What a glorious day!
Today is the first sunny day of this week, and after such a long stretch of rain, I think my need to get outside was as strong as that of my dogs. When I finally got home, we spend over an hour in the backyard – me trimming flowers and watering plants and generally puttering in the garden, and the dogs sniffing and peeing and barking and running and other happy-dog pastimes.
In addition to the lovely weather and the inviting outdoors, I managed a delightful hat trick with friends today. (Hat Trick = 3 in a row, usually refers to goals in sports)
My Friends Hat Trick --
1. My best friend Soldier Girl met me at school for lunch today. We had a very cheerful time. I’ve missed being able to talk to her in person, and I’ve missed getting to see her while she talks to me. (She’s very expressive.)
2. After school, I met my retired teacher friend Gretchen for coffee (although neither of us actually drank coffee). We had a lovely time. We talked about our families, our anxieties, what books we’ve been reading, what we’ve been learning, what churches we want to visit, and anything else we could think of. Gretchen is a kindred spirit; she understands me in a way that most people don’t. And I understand her fears and what is precious to her more than most people do. It was so refreshing to talk with her -- food for the soul.
3. After a disastrously stressful day, my teacher friend Connie called and wanted to hang out in the evening. She came and vented about her wretched day, and then we laughed together at my crazy dogs, and finally we decided to go see a late movie. Mr. Chandler went with us, and we chose “How to Train Your Dragon.” I’ve actually had an advertising poster for this movie stapled to my classroom wall since December, but I hadn’t seen the movie yet. It was quite entertaining. I really liked the way they animated and characterized the black dragon; he reminded me of a playful cat. The Viking boy was funny, and the animation was extremely creative in several places. I enjoyed it so much, I might have to see it again!
Fifth Week of April
Monday
This morning, on my way to work, I saw a coyote crossing Glisan Street. How crazy… an actual coyote. (I haven't seen a coyote since I moved to Portland from eastern Washington farm country.) It came from the woods next to the Wood Village Lowes and cautiously slunk across the road into the woods surrounding the ON Semiconductor complex (formerly LSI). The driver in the lane next to me and I both had to slow down while it walked right in front of us.
Coming so soon after my morning raccoon encounter last week, this made me think about the development of areas that were formerly quite wild. Gresham grew out of farm land and berry fields, and Fairview was developed on top of a massive bramble patch. I’m not really sure what Troutdale was, but Wood Village seems like a funny little after-thought. We’re so close to untamed forests and mountains and all of the wildlife that goes with those. I wonder if there will come a time when nature will take back the land, and the wild animals that we’ve pushed out will come back into the neighborhoods. A raccoon seems harmless enough, but a coyote? And does anyone else remember the cougar in Troutdale during the spring of 2006?
Tuesday
My action team was supposed to present at the staff meeting this morning. Imagine our anxiety when the Superintendent walked in with the Director of Curriculum and Instruction! They sat at a table and expected us to proceed with our presentation as normal. It was a bit intimidating. Fortunately, once we heard what they were there for, no one remembered anything my action team had to say.
When we were finished, the superintendent got up and started talking to us about our fabulous state test scores and how much good work we’ve done and how they need to replicate that in the other schools in the district too. As my colleagues listened, they apparently began to be very frightened that the district was going to transfer a bunch of teachers from our school into the other schools. (I heard this later.) They aren’t. Instead, they’re taking our principal and moving him to the district office to be the Director of School Improvement.
They brought our new principal with them, too. He is a TOSA this year at the district office, but he used to be one of our own 6th grade teachers. He is known and loved by the staff at our school. He seemed a bit nervous about the announcement, though, because he was lurking in the foyer of the library, not actually coming into the room. We were relieved to know that our principal would not be replaced by some wacko from who-knows-where, and even more relieved to know that we’re getting a good guy who is extremely even-keeled.
There was some minor outrage at the surprise of it all, of course. His teacher friends from the 6th grade team were shocked that he hadn’t told anyone, but he explained that he’d only known since the previous afternoon. The day before, he’d had lunch with us (and sat by me, talking with me about his new vice principal job at Parkrose Middle School for next year). When he left our lunch party, he said he was going over to Parkrose to sign his contract. Apparently, OUR district called him back to the office while he was driving over there. When he arrived, they offered him the head principal position at our school – and were very glad he hadn’t signed his contract yet with Parkrose. He felt awful about Parkrose, but they were nice about it, and this is a job he just couldn’t turn down.
As we proceeded through the rest of our school day after this very dramatic morning staff meeting, it seemed – for once – that the typical middle school drama for that day involved the teachers more than the students!
Wednesday
Holy cow. They arrested an 8th grader at Mr. Chandler’s school for vandalizing his neighbors’ property and for cutting down trees along Highway 26. They’re calling the kid the “Chainsaw Chicken.” I guess they’re assuming that there is something cowardly about his sneaking around at night. I wouldn’t call it cowardly… if someone is going to sneak around chopping down trees and causing dangerous traffic accidents, taking advantage of the cover of darkness seems like a wise choice (if you can use the word “wise” for someone like that). I never thought I'd say this, but maybe they should have given him some video games or something so he would stay inside...
Thursday
This afternoon, I attended the “community” forum put on by the school board for staff and community members to meet the two candidates for superintendent. I’m not sure they can really call it a community forum, since it was held at 4 p.m. while much of the community was still at work. The room was full of teachers, with a scattering of administrators and students. The candidate was interesting (in a lame sort of way). Every time someone asked her how she would handle a particular challenge facing our district, she answered by talking about things that are important… but she never actually said what she was going to do. “How will you try to increase student achievement?” “When you’re trying to increase student achievement, curriculum is really important.” (Yes… but what are you going to DO with it? Examine it? Replace it? Support it?) It was obnoxious, and it makes her sound like a poor communicator. I hope they don’t pick her.
Friday
I got new iPod games today! One of them is terribly addicting. It’s called “Flight Control,” and it involves tracing a path for airplanes to land on the runways safely (without hitting each other). It's way harder than it sounds. I also got a game called “Fruit Ninja” in which you use a sword to slice fruit. I like to play “Fruit Ninja” on mute and add my own sword-slicing sound effects. I have to be careful, though. I’ve already gotten some pretty weird looks from the people around me.
This morning, on my way to work, I saw a coyote crossing Glisan Street. How crazy… an actual coyote. (I haven't seen a coyote since I moved to Portland from eastern Washington farm country.) It came from the woods next to the Wood Village Lowes and cautiously slunk across the road into the woods surrounding the ON Semiconductor complex (formerly LSI). The driver in the lane next to me and I both had to slow down while it walked right in front of us.
Coming so soon after my morning raccoon encounter last week, this made me think about the development of areas that were formerly quite wild. Gresham grew out of farm land and berry fields, and Fairview was developed on top of a massive bramble patch. I’m not really sure what Troutdale was, but Wood Village seems like a funny little after-thought. We’re so close to untamed forests and mountains and all of the wildlife that goes with those. I wonder if there will come a time when nature will take back the land, and the wild animals that we’ve pushed out will come back into the neighborhoods. A raccoon seems harmless enough, but a coyote? And does anyone else remember the cougar in Troutdale during the spring of 2006?
Tuesday
My action team was supposed to present at the staff meeting this morning. Imagine our anxiety when the Superintendent walked in with the Director of Curriculum and Instruction! They sat at a table and expected us to proceed with our presentation as normal. It was a bit intimidating. Fortunately, once we heard what they were there for, no one remembered anything my action team had to say.
When we were finished, the superintendent got up and started talking to us about our fabulous state test scores and how much good work we’ve done and how they need to replicate that in the other schools in the district too. As my colleagues listened, they apparently began to be very frightened that the district was going to transfer a bunch of teachers from our school into the other schools. (I heard this later.) They aren’t. Instead, they’re taking our principal and moving him to the district office to be the Director of School Improvement.
They brought our new principal with them, too. He is a TOSA this year at the district office, but he used to be one of our own 6th grade teachers. He is known and loved by the staff at our school. He seemed a bit nervous about the announcement, though, because he was lurking in the foyer of the library, not actually coming into the room. We were relieved to know that our principal would not be replaced by some wacko from who-knows-where, and even more relieved to know that we’re getting a good guy who is extremely even-keeled.
There was some minor outrage at the surprise of it all, of course. His teacher friends from the 6th grade team were shocked that he hadn’t told anyone, but he explained that he’d only known since the previous afternoon. The day before, he’d had lunch with us (and sat by me, talking with me about his new vice principal job at Parkrose Middle School for next year). When he left our lunch party, he said he was going over to Parkrose to sign his contract. Apparently, OUR district called him back to the office while he was driving over there. When he arrived, they offered him the head principal position at our school – and were very glad he hadn’t signed his contract yet with Parkrose. He felt awful about Parkrose, but they were nice about it, and this is a job he just couldn’t turn down.
As we proceeded through the rest of our school day after this very dramatic morning staff meeting, it seemed – for once – that the typical middle school drama for that day involved the teachers more than the students!
Wednesday
Holy cow. They arrested an 8th grader at Mr. Chandler’s school for vandalizing his neighbors’ property and for cutting down trees along Highway 26. They’re calling the kid the “Chainsaw Chicken.” I guess they’re assuming that there is something cowardly about his sneaking around at night. I wouldn’t call it cowardly… if someone is going to sneak around chopping down trees and causing dangerous traffic accidents, taking advantage of the cover of darkness seems like a wise choice (if you can use the word “wise” for someone like that). I never thought I'd say this, but maybe they should have given him some video games or something so he would stay inside...
Thursday
This afternoon, I attended the “community” forum put on by the school board for staff and community members to meet the two candidates for superintendent. I’m not sure they can really call it a community forum, since it was held at 4 p.m. while much of the community was still at work. The room was full of teachers, with a scattering of administrators and students. The candidate was interesting (in a lame sort of way). Every time someone asked her how she would handle a particular challenge facing our district, she answered by talking about things that are important… but she never actually said what she was going to do. “How will you try to increase student achievement?” “When you’re trying to increase student achievement, curriculum is really important.” (Yes… but what are you going to DO with it? Examine it? Replace it? Support it?) It was obnoxious, and it makes her sound like a poor communicator. I hope they don’t pick her.
Friday
I got new iPod games today! One of them is terribly addicting. It’s called “Flight Control,” and it involves tracing a path for airplanes to land on the runways safely (without hitting each other). It's way harder than it sounds. I also got a game called “Fruit Ninja” in which you use a sword to slice fruit. I like to play “Fruit Ninja” on mute and add my own sword-slicing sound effects. I have to be careful, though. I’ve already gotten some pretty weird looks from the people around me.
In the words of Lucy Van Pelt…
Stop the world; I want to get off!
What a crazy couple of weeks… I have neglected my postings amid the hustle and bustle of work. And has it ever been hustling and bustling! What with the aftermath of the transfer process, the deaths of a high school teacher and the mother of one of my students, getting a new principal, the ongoing school board scandals about the budget process, a new superintendent, contract negotiations that have fallen into a black hole, and complications with the union officer elections, I consider myself lucky that I managed to keep up with my actual teaching job. While I’d like to say that things have settled down, I fear that’s not really true. So I’ll just say that I stumbled into a blissfully empty weekend… and I hope to get my blog postings caught up very shortly.
What a crazy couple of weeks… I have neglected my postings amid the hustle and bustle of work. And has it ever been hustling and bustling! What with the aftermath of the transfer process, the deaths of a high school teacher and the mother of one of my students, getting a new principal, the ongoing school board scandals about the budget process, a new superintendent, contract negotiations that have fallen into a black hole, and complications with the union officer elections, I consider myself lucky that I managed to keep up with my actual teaching job. While I’d like to say that things have settled down, I fear that’s not really true. So I’ll just say that I stumbled into a blissfully empty weekend… and I hope to get my blog postings caught up very shortly.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Fourth Week of April
Monday
This evening I stopped by to see the mother of my dearest friend – Soldier Girl. My friend arrives home tomorrow, and my attention will be on her, so I wanted to take this last chance to say hello and give her mom a hug. During my friend’s deployment, I thought of her mother often, usually taking comfort in knowing that someone else missed her as terribly as I did. She was so nice and welcoming, and we sat and chatted for a few minutes. Then my friend’s dad came home, full of stories about his day in the police department. The best part was when I was leaving and we were able to say, “I’ll see you tomorrow!” She comes home for good tomorrow…
Tuesday
My dear friend Soldier Girl came home today! She arrived just before noon and promptly went to sleep. I was invited to her first dinner at home -- at her parents’ house (probably because her mom realized that she was going to commandeer a vehicle and come to visit me, with or without dinner). After school and a couple of meetings, I finally made it over there. I was so happy to see her, and she seemed equally happy to see me. She was full of stories and things to show us, while I was full of questions. Her dad was full of his own stories about his time in the Marine Corps, and they reveled in their shared understanding of military ways. We sat around the dinner table for much longer than any of us are used to, and made no effort to move on until after it was dark outside. After such an evening and after missing her for so long, it was hard to leave her. At least this time I know it won’t be another four months before I see her again.
Wednesday
I know I say this every week, but I am seriously I need of a vacation. I can’t remember what happened on Wednesday (and it’s only 3 days later). That’s pathetic.
Thursday
This morning on my way to work, when I passed the last house before the school (the blue house at the northeast corner of school property), I saw a raccoon. He was sitting in the front yard of the blue house. As I slowed down to stare at him, he stopped whatever weird critter thing he was doing to stare back at me. As I slowly rolled toward the stop sign on the corner, he slowly backed away toward the neighbor’s house. SO random, and a little bit creepy…
I am growing increasingly frustrated at the configuration of my classroom. I sit in a weird corner with no view of the door or the pod. I have extra storage because I’m right next to the cabinets, but my area is so awkward and hidden. Also, the kids are always scooting their desks forward, which makes it impossible for me to get to my phone during class. (Mind you, getting rid of the phone would be an acceptable solution to me, but I don’t see that happening.) My work table is inaccessible, so I’ve taken to sitting at an empty student desk in the back row during class – but then the students who need help end up crowding the students who sit near me. It’s a problem, and it’s bothering me more and more every day. I plan to rearrange my room at the end of the school year (for next year)… It’s driving me crazy.
During seventh period today, I had some boys who were done with their work and looking for jobs to do or errands to run. So I had them move some bookshelves for me. They moved the shelves that house three sets of textbooks to the front corner of the classroom, leaving the back corner barren. As I faced the empty corner, I felt the old frustration with the layout of my classroom returning… and instead of making plans for the end of the school year, I impulsively decided to move my room around immediately after school. It took me about two hours to get everything moved, and I eventually called Mr. Chandler to come help me. I know it was stupid. Tomorrow, my kids are going to make a big deal out of it, and I’ll be cleaning up around the room for the next week. But I love it already!
Friday
I was right, on several counts:
My students made a big deal out of my rearranged room.
Other teachers thought I was crazy to move mid-year.
I have small, messy piles around the room now that have to be cleaned up.
My classroom is more functional already.
I can see who’s at the door.
I can have kids working at the work table (for the first time all year).
I have a place for visitors to sit.
I can see the caller ID on my phone.
This is fantastic.
This evening I stopped by to see the mother of my dearest friend – Soldier Girl. My friend arrives home tomorrow, and my attention will be on her, so I wanted to take this last chance to say hello and give her mom a hug. During my friend’s deployment, I thought of her mother often, usually taking comfort in knowing that someone else missed her as terribly as I did. She was so nice and welcoming, and we sat and chatted for a few minutes. Then my friend’s dad came home, full of stories about his day in the police department. The best part was when I was leaving and we were able to say, “I’ll see you tomorrow!” She comes home for good tomorrow…
Tuesday
My dear friend Soldier Girl came home today! She arrived just before noon and promptly went to sleep. I was invited to her first dinner at home -- at her parents’ house (probably because her mom realized that she was going to commandeer a vehicle and come to visit me, with or without dinner). After school and a couple of meetings, I finally made it over there. I was so happy to see her, and she seemed equally happy to see me. She was full of stories and things to show us, while I was full of questions. Her dad was full of his own stories about his time in the Marine Corps, and they reveled in their shared understanding of military ways. We sat around the dinner table for much longer than any of us are used to, and made no effort to move on until after it was dark outside. After such an evening and after missing her for so long, it was hard to leave her. At least this time I know it won’t be another four months before I see her again.
Wednesday
I know I say this every week, but I am seriously I need of a vacation. I can’t remember what happened on Wednesday (and it’s only 3 days later). That’s pathetic.
Thursday
This morning on my way to work, when I passed the last house before the school (the blue house at the northeast corner of school property), I saw a raccoon. He was sitting in the front yard of the blue house. As I slowed down to stare at him, he stopped whatever weird critter thing he was doing to stare back at me. As I slowly rolled toward the stop sign on the corner, he slowly backed away toward the neighbor’s house. SO random, and a little bit creepy…
I am growing increasingly frustrated at the configuration of my classroom. I sit in a weird corner with no view of the door or the pod. I have extra storage because I’m right next to the cabinets, but my area is so awkward and hidden. Also, the kids are always scooting their desks forward, which makes it impossible for me to get to my phone during class. (Mind you, getting rid of the phone would be an acceptable solution to me, but I don’t see that happening.) My work table is inaccessible, so I’ve taken to sitting at an empty student desk in the back row during class – but then the students who need help end up crowding the students who sit near me. It’s a problem, and it’s bothering me more and more every day. I plan to rearrange my room at the end of the school year (for next year)… It’s driving me crazy.
During seventh period today, I had some boys who were done with their work and looking for jobs to do or errands to run. So I had them move some bookshelves for me. They moved the shelves that house three sets of textbooks to the front corner of the classroom, leaving the back corner barren. As I faced the empty corner, I felt the old frustration with the layout of my classroom returning… and instead of making plans for the end of the school year, I impulsively decided to move my room around immediately after school. It took me about two hours to get everything moved, and I eventually called Mr. Chandler to come help me. I know it was stupid. Tomorrow, my kids are going to make a big deal out of it, and I’ll be cleaning up around the room for the next week. But I love it already!
Friday
I was right, on several counts:
My students made a big deal out of my rearranged room.
Other teachers thought I was crazy to move mid-year.
I have small, messy piles around the room now that have to be cleaned up.
My classroom is more functional already.
I can see who’s at the door.
I can have kids working at the work table (for the first time all year).
I have a place for visitors to sit.
I can see the caller ID on my phone.
This is fantastic.
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